When he opened his eyes again, he
found himself lying on a cold concrete floor. He looked around for a moment,
examining his surrounds. He was in a large, roomy space, flanked by 3 white
walls and a large door on a track that lifted it up into parallel with the
ceiling. There were boxes everywhere, labeled with the words “Christmas
decorations,” and “keepsakes.” Off to one side of the room was a large work
bench, with various tools and automobile parts laid out on top of it, which
were assumedly once part of the large blue-striped 1978 Chevrolet truck that
was resting in the middle of the room. The hood was open, to reveal the engine,
which looked to be all together much newer than the body of the truck it sat
in. Evan recognized this place as well. It was Matt’s garage, messy as ever. He
used it much more like a workshop than a storage space, though to hear Matt’s
mother tell it, the garage’s true purpose was to act as a shrine to the old
truck.
As Evan looked into the hood of the
truck, her heard the garage door’s electric motor come on, and watched as the
room was bathed in the glow of the automatic light that kicked on as the door
rose. He peered around the hood of the truck to see Matt making his way into
the garage. He watched as his friend dropped his bag next to the work bench,
and then walked his way around the vehicle, running his hands along the lines
of the body.
“You’re looking good, old girl.”
Matt said aloud, taking the time to use the sleeve of his sweatshirt to buff
one of the taillights. “You ready for your first performance?” Evan watched as
Matt’s face again broke into his wide grin, and then saw his friend make his
way back around the truck, grab his backpack, and head out of the garage door
and over into the house. Evan watched him go, and then turned his attention
back to the garage, noticing his blue-robed companion standing atop the work
bench, casually leaning against the wall it sat against.
“Why are we here?” Evan asked of
his companion in a somber tone. “It’s not like I ruined Matt’s day, too. His
truck is fixed, and besides, I never even showed up. What does this matter to
me?” As before, Dziga didn’t respond, but instead, waved his crooked stick out
in front of him, spinning it in a clockwise circle. Evan watched as the hands
of the clock on the wall began to spin faster and faster, and soon, nearly a
half an hour had gone by, where for Evan, it had been only a minute or so.
Then, Z stopped spinning his stick, and went back to casually leaning against
the wall. Evan was about to question him, when he heard the sound of a door
opening and closing, followed by the chatter of two voices.
In a moment, the figure of Matt and
his father came around the side of the garage, and entered through the massive
open door.
“So yeah, I guess he just caught up
with his girl.” Evan heard his friend say, as Matt stepped toward the work
bench, and reached for the key to the truck, hanging on the garage wall. “But
that doesn’t matter, I’ll show him some other time! Come on pop, you’ll be so
impressed, she purrs like a damn cougar!” Evan watched as Matt hoped into the
driver’s side of the truck, closing the door so that his father could move
past.
Matt’s father was a large man, with
a bald head and a grey goatee and mustache, which he apparently only rarely
trimmed. He had a large beer gut, which hung over the top of his old, ratty
blue jeans, and was poorly contained by the dirty, stained wife beater he now
wore. As the man came around the top of the truck, Evan saw he was holding an
open can of beer in his hand, which he lazily slurped as he found a place at
the back of the garage where he could lean against the wall.
“You ready, pop?” Matt called from
the driver’s seat. Matt’s father gave what sounded like a disbelieving chuckle,
and then lifted his beer in Matt’s direction. Evan took a step back from the
truck, and watched as Matt inserted the key into the ignition, and gave it a
twist. The engine of the truck roared to life in an instant, sounding like the
triumphant thunder of an army returning home from a battle, victorious in their
conquest. After the initial ignition, the engine sound leveled at a medium and
contended hum, sounding not unlike the purr of a large cat.
Evan saw Matt’s eyes light up in
joy, and looked back to see his friend’s father, a look of surprise and
disbelief on his old and scruffy face. However, this look did not last. In a
moment, the engine began to choke, and sputter, and, as quickly as it had come
to life, its roar died out. Evan looked back at his friend to find a look of
surprise, which was quickly replaced by one of panic. After 2 or three failed
attempt to coax the engine back to life, Matt leapt from his place in the
driver’s seat, and moved to the front of the truck, practically burying his
head in the engine, like a frightened ostrich buries its head in the sand.
“It was fine this morning! It
worked, I swear it did!” Matt protested, as if to convince the engine itself
that it should still be purring like a cat. To no avail however, and as Matt
frantically poured over the engine, trying to discover the source of the
problem, Evan looked over to see he friends father, doubled over with howling
laughter. After a moment, the gruff old man settled himself, and walked up
behind his son. He put his large, dry-skinned hand onto matt’s shoulder, and
spoke.
“You almost had me there, boy.
Listen, I know you’ve put a lot of work into this old piece of junk, but I’m
fer thinkin it’s time ya found yerself a new hobby. Maybe you take some time,
go find yourself a woman to be concerned with, like yer buddy, there, and you
won’t spend so much time worryin’ about this old heap.” Matt’s dad gave him a rough
pat on the shoulder, then made his way out of the garage, chuckling to himself.
Matt and Evan both watched him go,
and then Matt placed both his hands on the front end of the truck, and hung his
head. Evan could hear his friend trying to choke back tears of frustration.
Matt had spent his whole life trying to impress his father, and earn his
respect. His dad had been in the war, and spent a lot of time when Evan and
Matt were younger talking about the bright military career he expected of his
son. When Matt had grown older, and had started to turn away from the idea of
becoming military man, his father started to look down on him. For Matt, this
truck was the only way he figured he’d ever get an ounce of respect out of the
old man. Evan didn’t know how many times he’d heard his friend say, “If I can
just get the old girl runnin’ again, then he’ll have to respect what I can do.
He’ll lighten up on me, hell even enough that mom and I can convince that I
should go to school to be a mechanic!”
Eventually, Matt stood up and away
from the truck. He was still for a moment, arms at his sides, his hands curled
into angry fists. Then, with a roar of anger and defiance, he gave the truck a
swift kick in its front bumper. His face contorted for a moment, in regret,
then disappointment, but finally landed on a look of shameful acceptance. He then
shuffled his way around the side of the truck, and made his way out of the
garage, not bother to close the door behind him. Evan heard his friend open the
front door to his house, and close it behind him.
Evan turned back towards the truck,
and looked into the engine. He wondered why the engine had started running so
well, only to die a moment later. After a few seconds of examining, Evan
noticed something amiss in the engine. One of the old trucks’ spark plugs had
come lose. Evan remembered Matt had said something about how cars and trucks
from that time all used the same standard spark plugs, but that their fittings
could sometimes be slightly off. It was usually an easy fix, but it also didn’t
happen very often. Matt had said that he had looked over the truck once, and
didn’t think it was going to be problem. Apparently, in his panic, Matt hadn’t
thought to look for it. But Evan had noticed it. In fact, if Evan had been
there, in the moment, he might have noticed it then, too. It was the only thing
he really knew about the truck, so he might well have thought to look at it,
even though Matt did.
“Something wrong?” Again, Dziga’s
voice cut through the quiet. This time, Evan had definitely forgotten that he
was there. He looked up from the engine, and started at the inside of the hood
of the truck, wish that, by some magic, there would be a guide for him to
understand all the things that he had seen.
“Everything’s wrong. “ Evan said
after a moment. “If I had been here, I could have helped Matt. I could have
seen what he didn’t. Damnit Z, this truck is everything to him. And I was a
jerk to Sarah, and A jerk to my Mom, and to Emma.“ His voice grew in volume and
tension as he spoke. Suddenly, he felt himself lash out, swinging a fist at the
hood of the truck. Instead of colliding, however, he watched as he hand passed
on threw, and then as drew it back again, trying a second time.
“Upset?” Asked Z, maintaining his
usual tone, sounding just like Santa.
“ARGGH!” Evan screamed in
frustration. How could that damned little imp be so calm? All Evan could think
about was how much a jerk he was, how stupid and self-centered he’d been, how
unwilling he was to slow down and see life, to realize his perspective wasn’t
the only one. He felt his feet carry him out of the garage, and down his
friend’s driveway, to the sidewalk, and to the middle of the street, where he
dropped to his knees, and doubled over. He felt that feeling again, that knot
in the pit of his stomach that reminded him of what an idiot he was, and, after
letting out another scream of frustration, let himself start to cry. Bitter,
regretful tears, that came from somewhere in Evan’s heart and mind that he had
never accessed before. He felt alone, and stupid, like he was the worst person
in the world. He heard his own voice in his head, wishing a car would come
along and end his misery. As he blinked back the bitter tears, he turned his
head to one side, and saw the front of an oncoming car approaching, headlights
bathing him in a spotlight he never wished for. He closed his eyes again, and
turned his head back, taking in what he expected to be his last breath, and
holding it.
After holding his breath for nearly
10 seconds, he had to let it out, and, chocking on the sudden burst of air,
opened his eyes, and looked for the car he had hoped would hit him. Instead of
finding himself on the road, however, he found that his surroundings were
devoid of color, or light. Everything was not but empty blackness, as far as he
could see in every direction. He lifted his head, and sat back on his legs. As
far as he could tell, he was nowhere. There was no Matt’s house, no road, no
school, no Dziga, no nothing. Just… black. Evan tried his best to calm himself,
and stood himself up, brushing off the front of his pants. He looked around
again, and off in one direction, he though he saw a faint green glow. He made
his was towards it, and in a moment, came across a familiar ball of green
light. When he got close enough, he watched, as it formed itself into a frame,
within which, he saw an image of his mother, sitting on the couch, as she had
been before. This time, he could hear her voice, though. It sounded like she
was talking to herself.
“I’m doing everything I can, you
know. I’ve been doing my best. And your kids have grown into such beautiful
children. Evan’s a senior now. He’ll be going off to college soon. I’m not sure
where I’m gonna find the money, but we’ll make it work. I guess I could ask my
parents for help, but you know how they are. They’ll be in town tomorrow. I’ve
gotta get the house cleaned. I’d hate for them to think I didn’t have
everything under control…” The image faded out, and the ball of light reformed
into a ball.
As Evan looked away, he noticed
another ball, a few steps away. He moved over to it, and as he approached, it
opened. Within was an image of his sister, seated at their table, working on
her book report. Evan could just see her beginning to write a sentence at the
end of her paper “And so, Mr. Scrooge had learned his lesson.” Evan laughed to
himself.
“Yeah, squirt, something like
that.” Evan moved away from the image, and watched as the light reformed into a
circle. As it did, Evan noticed that, behind it, there were a number of other
little balls of green light, just floating there in the air. He looked over his
shoulder, seeing a number more, and then looked back, to see more had joined
the first. The longer Evan looked, the more balls of light there were, just
floating and dashing about. As they flew near him, they turned into frames,
showing Evan a myriad of images. There was one of a mother and father, holding
their newborn baby. Another that danced by showed a middle aged woman, holding
the hand of an old man hooked up to a number of medical machines. As the
picture passed, Evan heard the sound of the EKG machine tone out a week
heartbeat, and then, after a moment, signal that the heartbeat had stopped.
There were children playing, and people dancing, people starving, and people
fighting. He saw images of kids in school, of prisoners in their cell, or
doctors and patients in a hospital, and of people in offices, going about their
day.
“What is this place?” Evan wondered
aloud.
“It’s not a where, really.” Evan
heard Dziga say, and looked down at his side to see the little imp standing
next to him, staring up at the green glowing balls. “It’s a what. It’s
perspective. Everyone’s perspective.” Evan looked back up into the air, and saw
that there were now hundreds of thousands, or even millions of little balls of
light. He could see them above him and below him, and off in every direction.
It was as though someone had colored every star in the night sky a pale green,
and placed him and Dziga in the middle of it.
“Everything that could have been or
might ever been seen is here.” Z continued. “When you go through life, you only
see a tiny fraction of them, a minor collection of perspectives that you can
call your own. But the truth of the world is so much larger than that. In every
moment, there are a thousand smaller moments that you can pass over. For every
second that passes for you, the same second must pass for 7 billion other
people in their lives. And even then, think about all the places where people
aren’t at any given time. What might you see if you could look there?”
“I’m so… small.” Said Evan. He
heard his imp friend chuckle, before he replied.
“Well, yes and no. Your life is
important, especially to you and those around you. It’s just that, so is everyone
else’s. Your perspective is a valid one. But it’s not the only one.”
“So, what happens now?” Evan asked
look down at his companion. The imp returned his gaze with those glowing yellow
orbs of his, and replied.
“You go on. You take everything I
showed you, everything I taught you, and you make something of it.”
“I like the sound of that,” said
Evan, feeling suddenly very calm. “I want to do better than I did. I want to
stop living like my way of seeing and doing things is the only one that
matters. And, I want to show other people that, too.” Evan watched as Dziga
waved his staff out in front of him, and waggled the end up and down a few
times. As he did so, the little balls of light began to whiz off and by Evan,
like a million green shooting stars. After a moment, Evan saw the movement of
the light begin to slow, and saw that there was a single ball of light among
the rest that seemed to be moving towards his face. As it approached, it opened
up into the same green frame he had seen before. Within, he saw an image of
himself, sleeping. The light streaming in between the layers of his blinds told
him that it was morning, confirmed by the numbers on his alarm clock, which
read 6:59. Then Evan watched, as Dziga lifted his staff into the air one final
time.
“Sounds like a plan. Good luck!”
said the imp, bringing the staff down in front of him, resulting in a flash of
brilliant green light.
Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep. SLAM! Evan
grumbled to himself as he lifted his hand off the snooze button on his alarm
clock, and rolled back into a more comfortable position. If he didn’t know any
better, he might believe that 7:00AM was starting to come earlier and earlier
every day. As he lay still, with his eyes closed, hoping that time might
magically rewind a few hours, and grant him some more of his beloved sleep, he
went over everything that he’d be doing that day.
The day was likely to be typical.
In a moment, he’d… He’d roll over and… Evan’s eyes snapped open, and he rolled
over to see the clock, now reading 7:02. He rubbed his sore eyes, and though
hard to himself, thinking back on everything he had been through. “A dream?” he
thought. But then, he noticed something out of place. Sat next to his alarm
clock was a small, handheld digital camcorder. It was plain, and simple, not
the most expensive model, but nice. He reached out, and grabbed the camcorder,
bring it back to examine. He rolled it over in his hands a couple times, then
popped of the lens cap, and looked through the view-finder. After another
moment, he pulled the camera away from his face, and noticed the name of the
model on the side of the camera. The Vertov companies’ “Perspective” model. He
chuckled to himself, placed the lens cap back on, and made his way out of his
bedroom and into the shower.
A few minutes later, Evan came down
the stairs and into the kitchen, finding his sister making him a sandwich.
“Good morning, sleepyhead!” his
mother greeted him, waving at him with a spatula, before using it to point out
his plate of food on the counter. “I made you breakfast!”
“Thanks mom.” Evan said, grabbing
the plate and the envelope that sat under it and bringing them over to the
table. As he saw down, he saw his sister finishing making her sandwich, and
starting on a second.
“2 sandwiches?” he heard his mother
ask.
“Yeah, I thought Evan might like
one!” said his sister, smiling across the table at Evan.
“Thanks squirt! Hey, do you still
need help on your homework later?” Evan said as he started eating the bacon,
eggs, and hash his mother had prepared.
“You remembered!” his sister
squealed in excitement.
“How could I forget?” Evan laughed,
taking another bite.
“Well, you’re in an awfully good
mood this morning!” said his mother, as she cleaned up the breakfast dishes.
“Yeah, guess I just got a good
night’s sleep.” Evan replied. The, he thought for a moment, and after taking
another bite of his breakfast, spoke again. “You know, Mom. I think I want to
be a filmmaker.”